How To Act Confident When You Don’t Feel It

Guys ask the same question in a hundred different ways:
How do I act confident when I’m not confident yet?

Borrowed confidence gives you a practical answer. It gives you actions you can take even when your mind is spiraling. Here’s a Q&A built from the episode.

Q: What do I do on the days where I feel like I have no confidence?

You borrow it.

Confidence doesn’t show up first. Behavior does. When I’m low, I look at someone who already has the energy I want and I ask myself one thing. What would they do?
That’s the first step. Because “it is something that you can put on and take off.”

For more on this, read How Do I Build Confidence If I’ve Never Had It?.

Q: How do I act confident in a meeting?

You study someone who is.

Meetings used to scare me. I didn’t know how to speak up. I didn’t know when to jump in. That changed when I studied someone who showed me how presence actually works.
“I learned so much just by watching her.”

Her pauses. Her posture. Her tone. I tried it myself. And it became mine.

Pair this with How To Communicate Better At Work.

Q: What if borrowing someone else’s confidence feels fake?

Then take it off.

Borrowing is testing. Borrowing is trying things on. Borrowing is temporary. “You’re just borrowing it. You’re not keeping it.” If it doesn’t feel like you, return it and borrow from someone else. Confidence is built through repetitions, not replicas.

Read What To Do When You Feel Stuck if you feel blocked.

Q: How do I become more confident socially or in dating?

Borrow the energy, not the script.

Confidence in dating is about presence, not lines. “You can watch what he just did.” The posture. The ease. The courage to initiate. Try that part. You don’t need to copy what he says. You just need to borrow the energy that moved him forward.

Explore The Art of the First Text, How Do I Know If She Likes Me?, and Why Did I Get Ghosted.

Q: Can you borrow confidence from someone you’ve never met?

Absolutely.

The consistency framework I borrowed came from a creator I’d never met, but it shaped the entire year for me.
“Now it is a part of my own thing.”
Borrowing works even when the person doesn’t know you exist.

If you want momentum, check out How To Build Momentum When You Feel Lost.

Q: What if I feel completely out of my league?

Borrow presence.

That was me on the red carpet. I didn’t feel prepared. But I didn’t want fear to decide my life. So I borrowed someone else’s presence.
“I channeled what Emma Chamberlain did.”
And once I stepped into that energy, my confidence showed up faster than my doubt.

Pair this with How Do I Stop Caring What People Think?.

Q: How do I know when the confidence I borrowed is finally mine?

When it feels easy.

When you stop thinking about it. When the behavior becomes automatic. When you carry yourself differently without trying.
That’s when you know it transformed.
“I now feel like that is my own confidence.”

Explore more in Confidence and Mindset.

Want to hear the full story? Listen to the episode on Spotify or Apple Podcasts.