And We're Just Getting Started

Welcome to the 100th episode of guyset. 100 fucking episodes, that is so crazy to think about. Everyone has been asking me, everyone's like, Josh, what are you gonna do for the 100th episode? Like, who's gonna be the big guest? What are you gonna do? Like, it's such a big, huge milestone. Like, my god, we're all talking about it. Like, what are you gonna do for the 100th episode? my god. And.

I'm sad to say that Josh Peck has declined his appearance, or actually he never responded, he never saw, hit the request for his appearance for the 100th episode. So it is just me for the 100th episode. And to be honest with you, it was always going to be just me for the 100th episode. I am the person that has gotten me here from the start. I'm the person, I'm the only person who has believed in myself week after week, day after day to make this happen, to create something that I wanted to see in the world for 100 episodes.

So it was always going to be just me on this episode. And I wanted to talk about how I got here, what it took to create a really intense belief in myself to get here, to stop doubting myself so much, to block out all the noise that was really hurting me from doing this and get to where I am today, because I think that process is so interesting and it's something I always want to hear about and

For the 100th episode, I think it's so important to just look back at what it's taken for me to get here and how much of myself I have put into this and tell you all about that. So when I started guys set with my first two episodes, I dropped two at once almost two years ago. was June 23rd, 2023. I honestly had no idea what I was getting myself into.

just that there was something driving me towards this, towards this idea that I wanted to do it. What I did know was how much I wanted to see something like I wanted to create in the world. A place for young guys to hear advice and different perspectives on the things they're thinking about every day and all the time, wondering about, anxious about, maybe feel weird about not knowing where to find the answer to. Because I was that guy, and I am that guy.

Josh Felgoise (02:33.228)

What I didn't know was how much I would change from all of this and how much I'd grow from it over the past two years. I recently watched Martha Stewart's documentary on Netflix that talks about her rise and her fault becoming like the biggest self-made millionaire, billionaire woman in the world. And in that documentary, she says the secret was

I was the audience. When I heard her say that in the documentary, everything clicked for me. Everything made sense. Because that is exactly how I feel about this. As much as I'm talking to you and looking for answers to questions that you're asking or things that you're wondering about, anxious about, want to know more about, want to hear different perspectives on, advice on, I'm also talking to me too. The secret is

I'm the audience. Every week when I come on here and I talk about what I'm going through, what I'm feeling, or I bring somebody on to hear their perspective and their opinion, I want to know all of that just as much as I want to share that with you. The secret is I am the audience. When I started guyset, I kind of jumped with nothing below me and somehow the net just started to appear.

Things started falling into place and making sense when I did it, when I started believing in myself. And seeing the ideas I had in my head go onto the paper and into the world through audio in this podcast, through video, through social media, it absolutely felt like a jump. And it still does on so many days, but I jumped. And when I did,

things just started to make sense when I took a chance on myself, when I started believing in myself, when I just started, when I started creating, when I started putting things together, and when I started sharing it. I've always found the journey to get there, the building, the laying the bricks, and then seeing what makes the most sense. The most exciting part of all of this, so much more than the actual milestone or the celebration as

Josh Felgoise (04:53.08)

hard as those times are, like there are, there were so many nights in the past two years that I was up until 4 a.m. I kid you not, 4 a.m. editing some of these episodes that had a really small listenership to them. Like in the really early days when there wasn't a lot of people here, as many as there are now, which is so incredible to see. That's when it all felt the most important to me because I was doing it for myself. As I said, I was the audience.

And as hard as those times are, those are the moments where I feel like I've grown the most and I learned the most and I've just gained the most. Chasing a dream or something you believe in, something you're creating isn't supposed to be easy. It isn't supposed to fall into your lap and present itself to you on a silver platter because where would the fun in that be? Like where would any of the, where would any of it be in that? Where would the growth be in that? Where would the learning be in that?

You would be at the exact same place you are, with the same knowledge and the same understanding and the same ideas of yourself, having nothing changed if that was the case. And that's not a place I ever intend in staying in. And this is the same for anything as well as it is for everything. This 100th episode is nothing without episode 4 and episode 7.

and episode 24 and episode 38 and 69. didn't mean to say 69. It just popped out. I'm so sorry. And 69 and 74 and 88. You get what I'm saying? Like this milestone, this 100th episode is nothing without every single week of doing this and every single week of believing in myself and clouding out the noise and the judgment and all of the things I feel about myself that stopped me from creating and continuing and

halt me from believing in myself and just interfere with all of that creation. Those are all the bricks that I've laid to get here and that I'm just continuing to build. Like, it doesn't stop at a hundred. Like, a hundred is just another brick. Maybe it's a different color brick. And now there's more and more and more to lay. And I've created a foundation and a system and ways to make my dream a reality and ways to make what I want to see in the world possible.

Josh Felgoise (07:19.906)

And that's what I'm saying about the hundredth episode is just another brick that I'm laying. It's just another piece of the puzzle that I'm continuing to build. And I feel so grateful about that. I want to and I think it's important to stop and recognize and realize how much you've put into something. And I really do believe that it's important to celebrate moments like this, where a hundred episodes is a huge fucking milestone. Like, I think there's a percentage I'll look at. I'll look up at the percentage in

on Google, how many podcasts actually I'll do it right now. How many podcasts get to a hundred episodes? Because it's not that many. And like that is really something to be celebrated. But next week, next Tuesday is another episode I'm putting out. And I'm really excited about that episode. Like I don't plan to stop any time soon. I plan to never stop doing this. And that's why I think it's important to stop and smell the smell what you've built. I was gonna say roses or success. I don't know. I can't think of my words. I think it's important to recognize what you've built.

but also realize that you're still building and the building never stops, especially something like this because I don't want it to stop. How many podcasts make it to 100?

episodes. AI says roughly 5.36%. It's actually a lot. All right, whatever. Regardless, I feel so lucky I get to do this that I want to do this every day, that I'm driven to do it, that I wake up wanting to create something else, wanting to figure out what the next thing I can share is. And that doesn't mean that it's easy.

that it comes to me all the time naturally, that there aren't times where I question my belief I have in myself, that I falter on the vision I have and my ideas, that I don't think that I'm not good enough. Like, I want to recognize that all of that self-doubt, the disbelief, that is all still there, but it's quieter than the real is, it's quieter than the rest of it. Like, I think I've shown myself

Josh Felgoise (09:33.422)

Through 100 episodes, through consistency, through believing in myself every single week, week after week, and putting something out that I believe is important and should be heard and should be talked about and should be out there in the world for guys to hear and recognize that they're not alone in that feeling and they're not weird for feeling that way. And actually it's normal to feel that way. And there's somebody else feeling that exact same way too. Week after week, I bring myself to that.

and I put myself in the shoes of somebody listening right now, you listening right now or myself, because as I said, I'm the audience. So what would I want to hear? I would want to hear me being honest about my experience, me being real about what's going on, me sharing how I'm feeling about all of this. Maybe the self doubt is the topic and that's okay. And maybe there's a week where I feel so like there's, there's all, there's been those weeks, week after week, because it's been two years. Like I can't

I wouldn't lie to you and say that every week for two years, I have believed in myself so much and every week that it's easy to come up with an idea. Like that's not true. And that doesn't, it's not a bad thing either. And I think that's just life. And I have two years of my life kind of cataloged and in guys set that of course there's moments where I look back and I'm like, like I really wish I didn't put that out. Like that's really cringe. And

There's moments where I'm like, I really shouldn't have said that about that person because it got back to them and it wasn't a good look for me or, ooh, like that thing I said really hurt that relationship with that person. And I probably should have ran that by them first. And maybe I should have waited a couple of weeks to put that out. And there's always, there's been those moments. There's been a lot of those moments throughout two years of doing this that I've lost my way or that I've gone astray from what I wanted to do or that I lost my vision and faltered on it. And

That's okay. That's part of the process. I think it's important to share that with you and show that to you too. And I'm sure you've seen that and heard that in episodes. I'm sure you've left a couple weeks and been like, Ooh, like that wasn't, that wasn't it. Like, I hope he's okay. Like, Ooh, that, but that's real. And that's what life is like. Like you get a 30 minute to an hour snapshot of what my week looks like, what my feelings look like, what I'm feeling that week or that day. And,

Josh Felgoise (11:58.976)

It can be really fucking hard to be that vulnerable on here. But I think it's so important to do that. And that's why I've stuck with it week after week, because I am the audience. I want that. I want to see that. I want more people to be like that. And and I personally find the process people put into something, how they do it, what they listen to to get themselves there, who inspires them, how they make it happen in their busy schedules, how they balance their relationships and their friends.

and create the thing or do the thing they're trying to do. I want to hear all of that. I love all of that. I think that process part should be talked about so much more. I honestly could never get enough of it. Like I wish people were all transparent about the amount of work it took them to get somewhere and how much they faltered on their belief or doubted themselves throughout it and how they got through it and how they overcame it. And I wish people talked more about

and were transparent about the amount of hours and work it took them to get somewhere. The amount of hours it took them to study for the test. How many plans they had to cancel or things they had to give up or sacrifice or pass on to do that and to succeed. The amount they actually thought about all those plans and how much they were missing out in the FOMO and the doubt and the fear that crept in and how they shut all that out in order to get in the hours of studying that it took to pass the test or to take the test.

and maybe not even passed the first time and then that doubt and the belief and the rejection of that and that feeling. I want to hear all of that. I want to hear about the amount of applications somebody has submitted in the interviews they got dressed up for and ready for just to be turned down. How many weeks of self doubt and disbelief they had to go through to find the dream job that they finally found or maybe they haven't even found it yet. I want to hear about how hard it was to get there that even the boss had to go through that to get to where they are today. I want to hear about the rejection.

from the job, from the girl, from the boss, from the friend. I want to hear about how you dealt with that, how you overcame that, how you got to the place you are today and what advice you can give to somebody who's currently in that, who's currently struggling, who's currently going through that and doesn't know if they are good enough, if they can continue, if they, how they can keep facing this rejection again and again and keep showing up day after day, week after week, month after month. I want to hear all of that. I want to understand that everybody has been there because they have. want

Josh Felgoise (14:21.774)

people to share that more. I want to hear about how people are still in that, still trying to figure it out and mend themselves and put themselves back together every single day when they wake up, still put it together while putting a smile on their face for everybody else and trying to keep it together. The process and those moments are where you find yourself, where you meet yourself, where you meet yourself at your lowest, at your most vulnerable, also your highest and your most creative and your most you.

That's where you get the opportunity to build yourself back up. I want to hear all of that. I want to hear stories and new perspectives and advice and get advice from people who have experienced all of that, who know more than I do, so much more than I do, who know differently than I do. And then I want to share them all with you. It's a powerful thing we all have within us to share stories, to share our perspectives, to share advice, to share the tools that we've learned and developed.

through those times, through those iterations of ourselves, through those processes and through those moments where we just don't know what the fuck we're doing. And that we don't use that enough. We don't do that enough. Specifically, guys, we really never share what's going on. We never talk about how we're feeling in those moments and we keep it and we bury it down for people to never hear. And we forget about what it took to get to where we got to. Wow, that was a lot. I was very passionate about that.

There's a song I frequently listen to it's called Before Paris by Tom Mish and in the beginning of the song it says and I'm gonna read his lyrics so this is him not me and if you read if you heard it in my voice like it may not sound right I'm talking about a musician or an artist and okay I'm just gonna read it. Starting to try to become a musician or an artist something like that because you want to make money or you want to do a job that's the wrong way you have to do this because you love it.

And it doesn't matter if you're broke, you're still gonna do it. I go out in jam sessions and I play regardless of whether I'm getting a check or not. It's about whether I, and he cuts himself off. You have to love this thing, man. You have to love it. You have to breathe it. It's your morning coffee. It's your food. That's why you became an artist. Art is a mirror of society. I listened to that speech about artists and that person specifically.

Josh Felgoise (16:49.912)

to motivate me when I kind of lose my path, when I forget what I'm doing, when I lose my vision, when I falter on the belief I have in myself. And I don't consider myself, I'm not comparing myself to that person or those lyrics, but I think an inspiration like that. also listened to Steve Jobs' graduation speech, he gave it Stanford a lot. Those are two things that I listen to. And that's like a spoiler alert for an upcoming episode. I'm gonna talk about that speech coming soon.

those two things I listen to all the time to re-motivate myself and bring me back to the headspace I want to be in to keep doing this because you really do have to love something when there's no path for it. And I'm not saying this about job interviews or the work you're doing, but you have to work at the things you love, whether it's relationships, whether it's friendships, whether it's the thing you're creating on the side, whether it's that idea you have in your head.

Whatever it is for you, whether it's the thing that sparks every so often in the back of your head when you're walking outside and you get the idea but you push it down thinking, no, I could never do that. I'm not good enough to do that. When you're in bed at night thinking about what could be if you just tried, if you just did, but you talk yourself out of it thinking that you're not good enough.

When you're at work and an idea comes back to you and you think what life could look like if you just tried, but you tell yourself no and you convince yourself that it won't work, that you won't be successful, so you avoid it and you don't do it. Everybody has those sparks, those moments where they wanna try something new, they wanna do something, but they think they're gonna be judged for it, they think people are gonna think about them differently for it, or they think that...

they're not going to measure up to it and succeed at it. So they avoid it and they go toward a place of comfort, which is where you are currently because changing things up is uncomfortable and being uncomfortable. Nobody, nobody likes to be uncomfortable, but those are the moments where you grow and you learn the most about yourself and you're the most vulnerable and you're the most kind of transparent or translucent and like see through and it's, it's just you and

Josh Felgoise (19:07.052)

There aren't thousands of listeners here and this isn't the top 100 podcast on the charts. So to be honest with you, it's not like a successful podcast by industry standards, but I feel so successful when I do it. When I look back at the fact that I decided to try and take a chance on myself, believe in myself and jump, I feel so successful in that. There's a purpose there, a real sense of purpose in this.

and a massive value that I get and I hopefully give from doing this. And that's what it's all about to me. The excitement I feel when I get an idea for an episode and I write it down in my notes and then I go to record it and I sit down and watch it and edit it and put it together, that's the excitement that I've created for myself in the past two years that I didn't know existed before. It's a feeling that drives me and gets me going every day when I wake up.

I think to myself, what am I gonna create today? It's not how am gonna make another episode or what am I gonna talk about or worrying about, fuck, I have to put something out on Tuesday. It's that I get to do this, that I've given myself this, the opportunity to do this, to try, try again and try more. For me, it's so much more about the process, putting pen to paper, the idea, all of it, than

the milestone of it. And it's fun, it's always new, and it's always challenging. It's always going to be challenging. And there are so many times I said to you that I feel lost and that I don't know what to do. So instead of keeping that bottle dim and put a bottle in and pushing it down, I share it with you. And those weeks are the hardest, probably to put it out and to share it with you and come on here and talk about it because

It feels vulnerable and it feels like I'm pulling something out of me and giving it to the world. I know that sounds really dramatic, but like it does feel like that sometimes. And those are the weeks where I grow the most and those are the weeks where I learn the most about myself. And I usually find there's somebody else who feels that exact way too. I usually get some sort of feedback from somebody. It's like, Hey, I know exactly that feeling. Hey, I'm going through that right now too. Hey, thank you so much for saying that. I.

Josh Felgoise (21:33.594)

know what you're feeling. Like, hey, thank you so much for saying that and putting that out there. Like, I'm right there with you. I know when I put something out there, I know that there is another guy out there feeling that exact same way too. And that is what drives me every week.

I have met some unbelievably incredible people along the way doing this so far. Wow, that was a lot of words. I have met some incredible people along the way so far. I've had some incredible guests on here, people that I would have never thought I would have ever been able to talk to without having started this. I've learned so much more about my friends, about the people in my life, about guys in general, about guys in their 20s, about myself, and I...

feel so changed in an amazing way by doing this. And I'll tell you one of the best moments, I think I've talked about it before on here, but I want to highlight it again, was when I met this guy, he's probably two years younger than me, and he came up to me and said, you don't know me, but I've listened to almost every single one of your episodes. I live in, let's say, let's change where he lives. I live in Nashville, and I...

relate to everything you're going to. I've just never heard another guy say it. And hearing you talk about the same struggles that I struggle with and hearing you talk about the same anxieties that I face and the same uncertainties that I feel. Hearing you talk about that while also it seemingly feels like you have a lot in place at the same time makes me feel so much less alone in all of those feelings.

And that moment for me is what I think about every time I lose my perspective on this or I lose my vision for it. That interaction with that guy who tunes in every week just to hear some guy talk about his life and his feelings and share what he's going through because that's relatable and that's real and it's honest. And I hope you're listening today and I hope you're doing well. And

Josh Felgoise (23:48.458)

I said in the beginning, and I've said from the beginning, that I would do this if I had just one listener. Honestly, I would do this if I had no listeners. And I wanted to take a risk on myself and see how deeply I could trust and believe in myself. I'm so happy that there's not just one person and that there are so many of you listening right now. I feel so grateful that you come here every week to listen to me talk and...

hopefully gain some value from what I say. And I think it's really special what we've got going on here and that we're all a part of it. And maybe you're here right now hoping to find some sort of spark again or hear that extra push or advice in that direction. Maybe you're here to hear to hear to hear maybe you're here for some advice to gain some sort of value or maybe you're just here to be entertained for 30 minutes.

to an hour. Maybe you only come here for the guest interviews, which by the way I have a lot of incredible ones lined up for the upcoming weeks, I'm really excited about them. And maybe you stay for me. Whatever that is and whatever you're here for, from the bottom of my heart, thank you so much for listening. Thank you so much for being here. I mean that so sincerely. It means the world that you're here right now.

and that you've supported me to get to this place. I could not have done this without you. I feel like I'm giving an Oscars acceptance speech, but I genuinely do feel this way. I'm grateful for every single person listening right now, truly. Thank you so much for sticking with me through it all.

Through the moments where we were both like, what is going on here and what the hell is he talking about and why did he say that three or four times in a row as I'm sure I've done in this episode already. Thank you for giving me the space to try and to try more. Thank you so much for being here through episode one fucking hundred, 100 episodes of this, 100 episodes of Guy Set.

Josh Felgoise (25:57.79)

What? 100 fucking episodes of guys that that's so crazy. It's really crazy what believing in yourself can do. You you your you are the only one that can make your dreams come true. The only one that can bring your idea to life, the only one that can create the life you want to live. It's not easy, but it is simple. I'm really grateful to do this.

that I took a chance on myself. Thank you so much for listening to Guy Set, and we're just getting started.

Josh Felgoise (26:39.662)

It's so crazy. It's so fucking crazy. Like, I started this on this couch two years ago. Wow, I thought it was over and I was like, I'm just getting started. I thought it was over and now I still have more to say. I started this on this couch like two years ago with like, I don't even know. And I should have ended it when I ended it. we're, I'm just, I'm proud of myself. I'm really proud of myself and.

I hope that whatever you wanna do, this pushes you to do, or it just pushes you to believe in yourself a little bit more. Because if I hadn't, I would've been on this couch now, without this, without you, without this community that I've started to build, and that you're a part of and wouldn't exist without you, and without getting to go do this interview that I'm doing in an hour that I'm so fucking excited about, and without reaching out to people and getting rejected and...

all those moments where I heard nothing back and those weeks where I would do three episodes in a row of just me talking because I couldn't find a guest or I wouldn't get somebody to come on quick enough and those scheduling mishaps, those moments where I totally fucked up and messed up and I'm figuring it out as I go and like that's kind of the most exciting part of all this is getting to figure this out as I go and thank you for being here with me. Thank you for sticking through this with me.

Seriously, thank you so much for being with me through this all. I'm gonna use that ending again because I wrote it out and I really liked it. I thought it was a good dramatic ending. So I'm gonna do it again, even though I already did it. I'm really grateful to do this, that I took a chance on myself and we're just getting started. Yeah, that was good. Okay.

That is the episode. Thank you so much guys guys had to talk to him Josh 24 years old now I'm here every single Tuesday to talk about should we talked about for guys in their 20s if you like this episode a little bit Please like subscribe in this podcast five stars. Let me read that's one two, three, four five stars not four to three two. It's five stars Thank you so much. That would be awesome. If you could do that I really appreciate it just helps if you have anyone talk about should we talk to our guys in their 20s? And to my email it's josh at guys.com j o s h at gu isd.com or to my dms at the guys at th e g u i s e t on instagram or Whatever tick tock you can really talk to me on any social platform I have all of them and I post on them all every single day

Josh Felgoise (28:49.038)

You can also check out my sub stack, it's just guyset on sub stack. can go to my website, the guyset, no, no, it's guyset. can go to my website, guyset.com, G-U-Y-S-E-T.com for so much more for the newest edition of Guyset Magazine. I have so much more coming up for you. I have so much in store and really, we're just getting started. Thank you so much, listen to Guyset, a guys guide to what should be talked about and I will see you guys next Tuesday. See you guys.