How to Tell Your Friend He Smells
Why you have to speak up immediately and exactly how to do it without ruining your friendship
By
Guyset
Sep 16, 2025
Your friend has body odor, and you're the only one brave enough to address it. This might be one of the most awkward conversations you'll ever have, but it's also one of the most important friendship conversations. Here's why you need to speak up about personal hygiene and exactly how to do it without destroying your friendship.
Why You HAVE to Tell Your Friend About Body Odor
He needs to know about his hygiene problem. Your friend doesn't want to smell bad any more than you want him to. He's probably unaware of the body odor problem, which means he's walking around potentially embarrassing himself in social situations, at work, and especially in dating scenarios.
You're being a good friend. Real friends have uncomfortable conversations when necessary. Letting him continue with this hygiene issue while you stay silent isn't protecting his feelings - it's protecting yours.
The stakes are high for personal hygiene. Body odor can seriously impact someone's professional and social life. Women will immediately lose interest, coworkers will avoid close contact, and social invitations might dry up due to hygiene problems.
Two Proven Approaches for Discussing Body Odor
The Direct Approach for Hygiene Conversations
What to say about body odor: "Dude, I need to tell you something that's a little awkward. You've got some body odor going on, and I wanted you to know because I'd want someone to tell me."
Follow up with: "Are you using deodorant regularly? Maybe we need to find you a stronger one?"
Why this hygiene conversation works: It's honest, it's straightforward, and it positions you as someone who cares about his wellbeing rather than someone judging him.
The Softer Approach to Hygiene Issues
What to say: "Hey, I just got this new cologne/deodorant that smells amazing. You should try it - my girlfriend said it's the best I've ever smelled."
Then offer: Let him try it or buy him his own as a "gift."
Why this works for hygiene problems: It addresses the problem indirectly while giving him a solution. If he says he's already using natural deodorant or something similar, you can pivot to "maybe try this one too."
Timing and Setting Matter for Hygiene Discussions
Have this conversation about body odor privately. Don't bring it up in front of other people, even jokingly. This needs to be a one-on-one conversation about personal hygiene.
Choose a relaxed moment. Don't spring this hygiene conversation on him when he's stressed about work or dealing with other problems.
Be prepared for the initial reaction. He might be defensive, embarrassed, or even deny the body odor problem. That's normal. Give him time to process the hygiene feedback.
Understanding Why Body Odor Problems Happen
Medical issues: Sometimes persistent body odor is related to health problems, medications, or hormonal changes that affect personal hygiene.
Hygiene habits: He might not realize his current routine isn't working for his body chemistry and personal hygiene needs.
Product failure: Natural deodorants, expired products, or simply using the wrong type for his body can cause hygiene issues.
Lifestyle factors: Diet, stress, clothing choices, and washing frequency all impact body odor and personal hygiene.
What NOT to Do When Addressing Hygiene Problems
Don't make jokes about body odor publicly. "Dude, did you forget deodorant?" in front of other people is humiliating, not helpful for hygiene issues.
Don't use passive-aggressive hints about personal hygiene. Buying him deodorant as a "joke gift" or making comments about hygiene in general won't address the specific body odor problem.
Don't involve other people in hygiene conversations. Don't ask mutual friends to bring up body odor or complain to others about his smell.
Don't assume it's laziness. There might be underlying reasons for the hygiene problem he's not aware of.
Potential Responses to Hygiene Conversations and How to Handle Them
"I don't smell that bad": "Maybe it's just certain situations or times of day. Either way, I wanted you to know about the body odor so you could decide what to do about it."
"Thanks for telling me about the hygiene issue": "Of course, man. I'd want you to tell me the same thing about personal hygiene."
"I'm using natural deodorant": "That's cool - maybe this particular one isn't strong enough for your body chemistry. Want to try some different hygiene products?"
Defensive anger about body odor: "I get it, this is embarrassing to hear about hygiene problems. But I'm telling you because I care about you, not to make you feel bad."
Following Up After Hygiene Conversations
Give him time with personal hygiene changes. Don't expect immediate changes or bring up body odor again the next day.
Notice improvements in personal hygiene. If he makes changes, acknowledge them positively: "Whatever you're using now smells great."
Be normal after hygiene discussions. Don't treat him differently or act weird around him after the conversation about body odor.
The Dating Reality Check About Body Odor
Here's something that might motivate both of you to have this hygiene conversation: body odor is a relationship killer. Women will immediately lose interest if a guy has noticeable body odor problems. It doesn't matter how charming, funny, or attractive he is - persistent smell issues override almost everything else in dating.
The good news about hygiene: This is completely fixable. Unlike many dating obstacles, personal hygiene is something he has total control over.
Making Hygiene Conversations Less Awkward
Use humor appropriately in hygiene discussions: "This is definitely in the 'weird friend conversation' category, but..."
Relate it to yourself: "I'd be mortified if I was walking around with body odor and nobody told me about the hygiene problem."
Focus on hygiene solutions: Immediately move from pointing out the body odor problem to helping solve the personal hygiene issue.
When Hygiene Conversations Go Well
Most of the time, your friend will appreciate that you brought up the body odor issue, even if he's initially embarrassed about the hygiene problem. People generally want to know about fixable personal hygiene issues, especially ones that affect how others perceive them.
Long-term benefits of hygiene discussions:
Your friendship gets stronger because you proved you'll have difficult conversations about personal hygiene
He fixes a body odor problem that was potentially affecting multiple areas of his life
You both learn that honest communication about hygiene is possible in your friendship
The Bottom Line on Hygiene Conversations
Yes, this conversation about body odor is uncomfortable. Yes, he might be embarrassed or defensive initially about the hygiene issue. But you're doing him a massive favor by bringing up something that could be affecting his professional life, social relationships, and dating prospects.
The friend test for hygiene: Would you want someone to tell you if you had a similar body odor problem? Most people would say yes, even knowing it would be embarrassing to hear about personal hygiene issues.
Remember: You're not attacking his character or being mean about hygiene. You're giving him information he needs to address a fixable personal hygiene problem. That's what good friends do.
Don't let your friend continue dealing with this body odor issue because you're afraid of a few minutes of awkwardness. Have the conversation about personal hygiene, be kind but direct, and help him solve the problem. He'll thank you for it later.
Frequently Asked Questions About Hygiene Conversations
Q: What if my friend gets angry when I tell him about body odor? A: Give him time to process. Most people appreciate hygiene feedback later, even if they're defensive initially.
Q: How do I bring up chronic body odor without hurting his feelings? A: Focus on helping solve the hygiene problem rather than criticizing. Offer specific solutions like trying new deodorant brands.
Q: What if the body odor problem continues after our hygiene conversation? A: There might be medical reasons for persistent body odor. Suggest he speak with a doctor about ongoing hygiene issues.
Q: Should I tell other friends about his hygiene problem? A: No. Keep hygiene conversations private and don't discuss his body odor with others.
Sometimes being a good friend means having conversations nobody wants to have about personal hygiene. But that's exactly when friendship matters most.# How to Tell Your Friend He Smells: The Uncomfortable Conversation You Need to Have
Why you have to speak up immediately and exactly how to do it without ruining your friendship
Your friend has body odor, and you're the only one brave enough to address it. This might be one of the most awkward conversations you'll ever have, but it's also one of the most important. Here's why you need to speak up and exactly how to do it without destroying your friendship.
Why You HAVE to Tell Him
He needs to know. Your friend doesn't want to smell bad any more than you want him to. He's probably unaware of the problem, which means he's walking around potentially embarrassing himself in social situations, at work, and especially in dating scenarios.
You're being a good friend. Real friends have uncomfortable conversations when necessary. Letting him continue with this problem while you stay silent isn't protecting his feelings - it's protecting yours.
The stakes are high. Body odor can seriously impact someone's professional and social life. Women will immediately lose interest, coworkers will avoid close contact, and social invitations might dry up.
Two Approaches That Actually Work
The Direct Approach
What to say: "Dude, I need to tell you something that's a little awkward. You've got some body odor going on, and I wanted you to know because I'd want someone to tell me."
Follow up with: "Are you using deodorant regularly? Maybe we need to find you a stronger one?"
Why this works: It's honest, it's straightforward, and it positions you as someone who cares about his wellbeing rather than someone judging him.
The Softer Approach
What to say: "Hey, I just got this new cologne/deodorant that smells amazing. You should try it - my girlfriend said it's the best I've ever smelled."
Then offer: Let him try it or buy him his own as a "gift."
Why this works: It addresses the problem indirectly while giving him a solution. If he says he's already using natural deodorant or something similar, you can pivot to "maybe try this one too."
Timing and Setting Matter
Have this conversation privately. Don't bring it up in front of other people, even jokingly. This needs to be a one-on-one conversation.
Choose a relaxed moment. Don't spring this on him when he's stressed about work or dealing with other problems.
Be prepared for the initial reaction. He might be defensive, embarrassed, or even deny it. That's normal. Give him time to process.
Understanding Why This Happens
Medical issues: Sometimes persistent body odor is related to health problems, medications, or hormonal changes.
Hygiene habits: He might not realize his current routine isn't working for his body chemistry.
Product failure: Natural deodorants, expired products, or simply using the wrong type for his body.
Lifestyle factors: Diet, stress, clothing choices, and washing frequency all impact body odor.
What NOT to Do
Don't make jokes about it publicly. "Dude, did you forget deodorant?" in front of other people is humiliating, not helpful.
Don't use passive-aggressive hints. Buying him deodorant as a "joke gift" or making comments about hygiene in general won't address the specific problem.
Don't involve other people. Don't ask mutual friends to bring it up or complain to others about his smell.
Don't assume it's laziness. There might be underlying reasons he's not aware of.
Potential Responses and How to Handle Them
"I don't smell that bad": "Maybe it's just certain situations or times of day. Either way, I wanted you to know so you could decide what to do about it."
"Thanks for telling me": "Of course, man. I'd want you to tell me the same thing."
"I'm using natural deodorant": "That's cool - maybe this particular one isn't strong enough for your body chemistry. Want to try some different options?"
Defensive anger: "I get it, this is embarrassing to hear. But I'm telling you because I care about you, not to make you feel bad."
Following Up
Give him time. Don't expect immediate changes or bring it up again the next day.
Notice improvements. If he makes changes, acknowledge them positively: "Whatever you're using now smells great."
Be normal. Don't treat him differently or act weird around him after the conversation.
The Dating Reality Check
Here's something that might motivate both of you to have this conversation: body odor is a relationship killer. Women will immediately lose interest if a guy has noticeable body odor. It doesn't matter how charming, funny, or attractive he is - persistent smell issues override almost everything else.
The good news: This is completely fixable. Unlike many dating obstacles, hygiene is something he has total control over.
Making It Less Awkward
Use humor appropriately: "This is definitely in the 'weird friend conversation' category, but..."
Relate it to yourself: "I'd be mortified if I was walking around smelling bad and nobody told me."
Focus on solutions: Immediately move from pointing out the problem to helping solve it.
When the Conversation Goes Well
Most of the time, your friend will appreciate that you brought it up, even if he's initially embarrassed. People generally want to know about fixable problems, especially ones that affect how others perceive them.
Long-term benefits:
Your friendship gets stronger because you proved you'll have difficult conversations
He fixes a problem that was potentially affecting multiple areas of his life
You both learn that honest communication is possible in your friendship
The Bottom Line
Yes, this conversation is uncomfortable. Yes, he might be embarrassed or defensive initially. But you're doing him a massive favor by bringing up something that could be affecting his professional life, social relationships, and dating prospects.
The friend test: Would you want someone to tell you if you had a similar problem? Most people would say yes, even knowing it would be embarrassing to hear.
Remember: You're not attacking his character or being mean. You're giving him information he needs to address a fixable problem. That's what good friends do.
Don't let your friend continue dealing with this issue because you're afraid of a few minutes of awkwardness. Have the conversation, be kind but direct, and help him solve the problem. He'll thank you for it later.
Sometimes being a good friend means having conversations nobody wants to have. But that's exactly when friendship matters most.