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#79 - How To Actually Achieve Your Goals

Dec 31, 2024

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Here’s how to actually achieve the goals you set for yourself and create ways to make each one happen so you can look back at the end of the month and be like, I did that! Here's how to start today.

How to Set Goals You'll Actually Keep: A Realistic Approach to New Year's Resolutions

Originally featured on the Guyset podcast - your guide to what should be talked about

What a Difference a Year Can Make

Recently, my favorite fitness instructor said something that stopped me in my tracks: "What a difference a year can make."

That simple phrase sent me into deep reflection about where I was last November versus where I am now. The transformation wasn't accidental - it happened because I consistently stuck to a few key things I believed I could do.

Here's the reality: Setting a goal and actually sticking to it is incredibly hard. Between day jobs, social lives, family obligations, and relationships, finding the consistency to make meaningful changes can feel impossible.

But what if I told you there's a better way to approach goal-setting that doesn't involve waiting until January 1st to start fresh?

Why December is the Perfect Time to Start

Most people wait until New Year's to set resolutions. They create massive lists of changes they want to make, get overwhelmed, and abandon everything by February.

Instead, try this: Use December as your practice round. Look back at this year while you're still in it, and start working on one meaningful goal before the calendar flips.

Why this works:

You're not competing with the pressure of "New Year, New Me"
You get to test your systems before the real commitment
You can build momentum heading into January
There's still time left in the year to make progress

The Two-Step Reflection Process

Step 1: What Did You Actually Accomplish?

Take a moment right now and think about 1-2 things you really wanted to do this year that you actually did.

Maybe you:

Put yourself out there more and went on actual dates
Finally left a job you hated and started seriously looking for something better
Started budgeting and got your finances in order
Began working out consistently

Write these down. Seriously. Use your phone's notes app or grab a piece of paper. You need to see your wins in writing.

Step 2: What Didn't You Get To?

Now think about 1-2 things you wanted to do but didn't get to yet.

Notice the language here: "didn't get to" instead of "failed at" or "messed up." This isn't a mark on your report card - it's an opportunity to try again.

Examples might include:

Learning to type with all your fingers
Reading more consistently
Cooking at home instead of eating out
Starting that side project you've been thinking about

Write these down too. These become your candidates for this month's focus.

The One-Goal Strategy

Here's where most people go wrong: They try to change everything at once.

Instead, pick ONE thing you want to accomplish this month. Something you can look back on at the end of December and say, "Hell yeah, I actually did that."

Your goal could be:

Learning to dress better
Drinking more water consistently
Going to bed earlier
Networking more at work
Starting to meal prep
Calling your mom more often
Learning a new skill like guitar or golf

The key: Choose something that will genuinely benefit your everyday life, but start with just one thing.

Real Examples: My December Goals

Let me share six goals I'm considering, along with which two I'm actually starting with this month:

1. Not Checking My Phone First Thing in the Morning

The problem: I've developed a terrible habit of grabbing my phone before I even open my eyes fully. I'm immediately scrolling Instagram, TikTok, texts, and work emails before putting together a single coherent thought.

Why it matters: This creates anxiety and overwhelm before I've even gotten out of bed.

My system: I moved my phone away from my bedside table. I have to physically get up before I can check it. Since I use an Alexa alarm, I don't need my phone to wake up.

Day one result: I didn't check my phone until I left my apartment. I saw the sun before I saw my screen, and it felt amazing.

2. Learning to Type with All My Fingers

The background: I currently type with 3-4 fingers, which is inefficient for work and everything else.

My system: Calendar 5 minutes of typing practice into my workday. If work gets busy, I'll move those 5 minutes, but they stay on the calendar.

Why this approach: It's like learning a language - you need daily practice to improve, and missing weeks sets you back to square one.

Future Goals (Adding One at a Time):

Learning guitar (passion project)
Reading before bed instead of scrolling
Getting better at video editing
Focusing on one task at a time instead of multitasking

Notice: I'm only starting with two goals, and I'll only add more once I feel secure and comfortable with these.

The Secret: Systems Over Willpower

The difference between goals that stick and goals that fail isn't willpower - it's systems.

For each goal, ask yourself: "What specific changes will I make to my environment or routine to make this happen?"

Examples of Effective Systems:

Goal: Stop checking phone in the morning

Bad approach: "I'll just use more self-control"
Good approach: Move phone away from bed, use separate alarm

Goal: Drink more water

Bad approach: "I'll remember to drink more"
Good approach: Fill a large water bottle each morning, set phone reminders

Goal: Read before bed

Bad approach: "I'll read instead of scrolling"
Good approach: Put phone in another room, keep book on nightstand

Goal: Exercise consistently

Bad approach: "I'll motivate myself to go"
Good approach: Schedule specific days/times, prepare gym clothes the night before

The "No Failure" Mindset

Here's the most important mindset shift: These are goals, not assignments. There is no failing, only improving.

Once you start, you can only:

Slow down
Go up

You cannot go backwards. Once you've started working toward a goal, you're already ahead of where you were before.

Had a bad day and skipped your new habit? That's not failure - that's data. What can you adjust in your system to make tomorrow easier?

Why the Process Matters More Than Results

The problem-solving required to figure out how to make a goal happen is often more valuable than achieving the goal itself.

When you commit to making a positive change, you're:

Building confidence in your ability to follow through
Developing problem-solving skills
Proving to yourself that you can stick to commitments
Creating momentum for future goals

The journey teaches you more about yourself than the destination ever could.

Your December Action Plan

Week 1: Reflection and Planning

Write down 1-2 things you accomplished this year that you're proud of
Write down 1-2 things you wanted to do but didn't get to
Choose ONE goal to focus on this month
Design a specific system to make that goal happen

Week 2-4: Implementation and Adjustment

Start your new habit using your designed system
Track your progress (even just mentally noting good and bad days)
Adjust your system if something isn't working
Celebrate small wins along the way

End of December: Evaluation

Assess how your month went - what worked, what didn't?
Decide if you're ready to add a second goal in January
Refine your approach based on what you learned

Common Goal-Setting Mistakes to Avoid

Mistake 1: Choosing Too Many Goals

The fix: Start with one, add more only after the first becomes routine

Mistake 2: Relying on Motivation

The fix: Build systems that work even when you don't feel motivated

Mistake 3: All-or-Nothing Thinking

The fix: Progress over perfection - small improvements compound over time

Mistake 4: Vague Goal Setting

The fix: Be specific about what you'll do and when you'll do it

Mistake 5: No Accountability System

The fix: Tell someone about your goal or track it visibly

The Monthly Goal Approach for Next Year

Instead of making 10 New Year's resolutions, try this approach:

January: Master your December goal + add one new goal
February: Continue January goals + add another if ready
March: Continue established goals + add another if ready

This way, by December you'll have:

12 opportunities to start something new
A much higher success rate on individual goals
Sustainable habits instead of overwhelming lists
Momentum carrying you into the following year

Making It Stick: Advanced Strategies

Environment Design

Change your environment to support your goal. Don't rely on willpower when you can rely on smart design.

Implementation Intentions

Instead of "I will exercise more," try "I will go to the gym on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday at 7 AM after I brush my teeth."

Social Accountability

Tell someone about your goal. Even better, find someone working on a similar goal and check in regularly.

Progress Tracking

Keep it simple - a checkmark on a calendar or a note in your phone. Just something to make progress visible.

Habit Stacking

Attach your new habit to an existing routine. "After I pour my morning coffee, I will write for 10 minutes."

When Goals Don't Go as Planned

Some days you'll skip your new habit. This is normal and expected, not a reason to quit.

Questions to ask instead of giving up:

What made today particularly difficult?
Is my system too ambitious for my current life?
What small adjustment could make tomorrow easier?
How can I get back on track without starting over completely?

Remember: The goal isn't perfection, it's consistency over time.

The Bigger Picture

Goal-setting isn't really about the specific goals - it's about becoming the type of person who follows through on commitments to themselves.

Each time you stick to a goal, you're proving to yourself that:

Your word to yourself matters
You're capable of positive change
You can figure out solutions to problems
You're worth the effort of self-improvement

These meta-skills transfer to every area of your life: work, relationships, health, and personal growth.

Your Next Step

Right now, while you're reading this, choose one goal for December.

Then answer these questions:

What specific action will I take?
When will I do this action?
What system will I create to make this easier?
How will I track my progress?
Who can I tell about this goal for accountability?

Don't wait until January 1st. Don't wait until Monday. Don't wait until you feel "ready."

Start today. Start small. Start with systems, not just willpower.

What a difference a year can make - but only if you start somewhere.

Ready to turn your goals into reality? Listen to new episodes of Guyset every Tuesday on your favorite podcast platform for more practical advice on building the life you want. Sign up for the weekly newsletter at guyset.com, email josh@guyset.com with your goals and progress, or connect with us @theguyset on social media for accountability and support.

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