This is part 1 of my interview with my friend Luke. Part 2 is dropping tomorrow!

I apologize for the air conditioning in the beginning, it stops at 6 minutes so push through or skip to timestamp 6.26. And the timestamps are all below so feel free to skip around. In this episode we talk about life after college, Luke's specific workout routine, being a consultant, traveling for work, interview advice, talking to girls at a bar, and LUKE SHARES HIS FULL HINGE PROFILE WITH US. We talk about height on Hinge and so much more. It’s a good one and stick around because part 2 is next with so much more…

The Complete Guide to Dating in Your 20s: Hinge Tips, First Dates, and Building Confidence

Real advice from guys who are figuring it out - covering everything from Hinge profiles to approaching women at bars

Dating in your twenties feels completely different than it did in college. Gone are the days of randomly meeting people at parties or having endless free time to hang out. Now you're juggling work schedules, gym routines, and trying to build a career while still figuring out how to meet someone you actually connect with.

In a recent episode of Guyset, we sat down with Luke, a 24-year-old working in tech consulting in NYC, to break down the real challenges guys face when dating after college. Here's what we learned about building an authentic dating life in your twenties.

The Post-College Dating Reality Check

Why Everything Changed After Graduation

"I think the biggest thing like post-grad that you kind of fall into or realize is like how important routine is," Luke explains. In college, chaos was part of the fun. You could stay up until 3 AM, skip class, and still find time to hang out with friends and meet new people.

Now? "If you're working eight hours a day, the time before work, the time after work, you kind of have to be really specific with how you spend that, because there's not that much of it during the week."

This shift affects everything - including how and when you meet potential partners. The spontaneous meetups are replaced by intentional planning. The random encounters become deliberate choices about where to spend your limited free time.

The New Dating Landscape

Your dating life now has to fit around:

• Work schedules (40+ hours per week)

• Gym routines (essential for physical and mental health)

• Career development (networking, skill building)

• Adult responsibilities (laundry, groceries, apartment maintenance)

• Sleep (actually matters now)

This isn't necessarily bad - it just requires a more strategic approach than the "go with the flow" mentality that worked in college.

How to Meet Women: Beyond the Obvious

The Bar Approach: Quality Over Pickup Lines

When asked about talking to women at bars, Luke's advice is refreshingly honest: "The easiest way to talk to girls at a bar is to be doing your own thing at a bar with your friends."

His strategy:

• Focus on having fun with your friends first

• Don't go in with an agenda to meet someone

• Be genuinely enjoying yourself

• Let natural conversations happen

"The majority of people that I've met at bars have come up to me and said like, you just look like you're having a fucking blast right now."

Why this works: People are attracted to authentic enjoyment. When you're not trying to impress anyone and genuinely having a good time, you become more approachable and interesting.

Alternative Meeting Places That Actually Work

Concerts: "If you're going to a concert like you paid money to go see somebody, chances are the other people at that concert are kind of on the same wavelength as you."

Benefits of meeting someone at concerts:

• Built-in conversation starters ("How do you know this artist?")

• Shared interests and taste in music

• Natural sense of community and shared experience

• Less pressure than traditional "pickup" scenarios

Other venues to consider:

• Fitness classes or climbing gyms

• Coffee shops (especially if you're a regular)

• Volunteer events

• Professional networking events

• Hobby-based meetups

Mastering Hinge: A Real Profile Breakdown

Luke shared his actual Hinge profile with us, and it's a masterclass in standing out while staying authentic. Here's what makes it work:

The Philosophy: Don't Take Yourself Too Seriously

Luke's profile is intentionally playful and meme-heavy. His first photo? Him in a cow onesie eating a burger. His job? "CEO at Build-A-Bear."

Why this approach works:

• Shows personality and humor

• Filters for people with compatible senses of humor

• Stands out from generic "gym selfie + hiking photo" profiles

• Demonstrates confidence (you have to be confident to post yourself in a cow onesie)

Profile Elements That Get Responses

Most liked photo: Him with a cute dog Prompts that generate conversations:

• "What if I told you that I say 'hi cows' every time I pass a farm while driving?"

• Alaska geography fact (shows he's knowledgeable but not pretentious)

The key insight: "You want something that people can respond to." Every element should give someone an easy way to start a conversation.

Red Flags to Avoid

According to Luke, profiles that turn him off include:

• Generic prompts like "Fuck, Marry, Kill: Tequila, Vodka, Rum"

• Basic answers that everyone uses

• Profiles with no personality or conversation starters

Height Strategy: Underpromise, Overdeliver

Luke lists his height as 5'9" when he's actually closer to 5'10". His reasoning: "The last thing I would ever want is for someone to show up to a date with me and be like, man, I thought he was gonna be taller."

The principle: It's better for someone to be pleasantly surprised than disappointed. This applies to all aspects of your profile - don't oversell yourself.

The Job Interview Connection: Building Confidence for Dating

Luke's advice about job interviews surprisingly applies perfectly to dating: "The best interviews I've had have just felt like conversations with maybe not a friend, but like someone you just met, like a normal conversation."

How to Get Conversational (in interviews and dates):

1. Practice breathing techniques - If you're nervous, take a moment to breathe

2. Have a mental checklist - Know your strengths and stories you want to share

3. Use a hype song - Luke uses music to get in the right mindset before big moments

4. Focus on connection over perfection - They want to know who you are, not get perfect answers

The goal isn't to be flawless - it's to be genuinely yourself in a way that creates connection.

Life After College: Building the Foundation for Good Dating

The Importance of Routine

Luke's typical day shows how successful dating fits into a well-structured life:

Virtual work days:

• 6:50 AM: Wake up

• 7:15 AM: Gym (with workout partner for accountability)

• 8:40 AM: Finish workout, shower

• 9:00 AM: Start work

• Evening: Available for dates or social activities

In-office days:

• 6:00 AM: Gym near office

• Shower at gym

• Walk to office

• Home by dinner time

Why This Matters for Dating

Having a solid routine means:

• You're taking care of yourself (attractive)

• You have energy for dating (not exhausted from poor habits)

• You can be flexible when opportunities arise

• You're building an interesting life worth sharing with someone

The Gym Advantage

Working out consistently provides multiple dating benefits:

• Physical confidence - You feel better about how you look

• Mental health - Exercise reduces anxiety and improves mood

• Social opportunities - Gym friendships and accountability partners

• Stress management - Essential for handling work and dating pressure

Luke works out with a friend (Luca) and emphasizes the importance of consistency: "There's pretty much nothing - it's like mandatory for me to start my day. It's just how I wake up in the morning."

Building a Life Worth Sharing

The Transition Challenge

"You're working eight hours a day, like the time before work, the time after work, you kind of have to be really specific with how you spend that, because there's not that much of it during the week."

This scarcity of free time means you need to be intentional about:

• What activities you prioritize

• Where you spend your social time

• How you maintain friendships while dating

• When you're available for dates

Creating Dating Opportunities Within Your Routine

Instead of trying to find extra time for dating, integrate it into your existing life:

• Replace some bar nights with concert outings

• Try coffee dates instead of always doing dinner

• Suggest active dates that align with your fitness routine

• Be strategic about weekend plans

The Mindset Shift: From College to Adult Dating

What Changed

College dating: Spontaneous, low-stakes, lots of time to figure things out Post-grad dating: Intentional, higher stakes, limited time, more serious considerations

The New Priorities

• Compatibility with your actual lifestyle (not just your fun side)

• Shared values and goals (career ambitions, life direction)

• Sustainable communication patterns (not just late-night texting)

• Physical and emotional health (both yours and theirs)

Practical Action Items

For Your Hinge Profile:

1. Show personality - Don't be afraid to be weird or funny

2. Include conversation starters - Every prompt should be easy to respond to

3. Mix silly with substance - Balance humor with genuine interests

4. Use recent, authentic photos - No need to be perfect, just real

For Meeting People IRL:

1. Focus on having fun first - Don't go out with pickup as the primary goal

2. Try new venues - Concerts, hobby groups, fitness classes

3. Be consistently social - Regular presence in activities you enjoy

4. Stay approachable - Genuine enjoyment is attractive

For Dating Success:

1. Build a routine you're proud of - Take care of your physical and mental health

2. Develop conversation skills - Practice being genuinely curious about others

3. Know your strengths - Be ready to share what makes you interesting

4. Stay authentic - The right person will appreciate the real you

The Bottom Line

Dating in your twenties requires a different approach than college, but it can be more rewarding. You have more to offer, clearer ideas about what you want, and the life experience to build genuine connections.

The key isn't to become someone you're not - it's to become the best version of who you already are. Build a life you're excited about, take care of yourself, and approach dating as one enjoyable part of a well-rounded existence.

As Luke's experience shows, authenticity beats perfection every time. Whether it's posting yourself in a cow onesie or admitting you say "hi" to cows while driving, the goal is to attract people who appreciate your actual personality.

Remember: The right person will be excited about the weird, wonderful, genuine person you are. Your job is to make sure you're putting that person forward, both in your dating profile and in real life.

Want more practical advice for navigating your twenties? Subscribe to Guyset for weekly insights on dating, career, fitness, and figuring out adult life.

Listen to the Full Episode

This post only covers Part 1 of our conversation with Luke. For the complete discussion, including his thoughts on first dates, confidence vs. cockiness, and transitioning from living with roommates to living alone, listen to the full two-part episode series.

Timestamps:

2:13 Interview with Luke starts

3:30 Luke introduces himself

5:12 We share our first blackout stories

6:26 I realize the AC is still on, turn it off, and then continue the story

9:30 we talk about the significance of ages 23 and 24

10:55 We talk about the transition to life after college and new routines

14:13 How Luke spends his time before work

18:14 We get into the specifics of Luke’s workout routine

22:58 We talk about his routine going to work

24:38 Luke talks about being a consultant and traveling for work

29:07 We talk about job interviews and we both give our advice and tips for interviews

38:41 DATING SECTION begins... oh baby

40:29 How do you talk to girls at a bar

41:59 How do you meet girls outside of a bar

43:03 The HINGE section. We go through Luke’s entire hinge profile, honestly just do yourself a favor and listen to the whole thing.

53:17 We start talking about first dates... go to part 2 for the rest.

Thank you for listening!

Send in any questions, things you want me to talk about, or things that should be talked about for guys in their 20s to josh@guyset.com  

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See you tomorrow, and then again next Tuesday.